Excuses?

So when it comes down to it, after say, around Valentines day, more or less, those ninety percent of gym goers appear to disappear off of the face of the earth. Being that it’s the first week of January, each fitness center across America is going to see their sales skyrocket. Not bad, right? No, not at all, but the question that remains is, why do they disappear? There are many excuses, er, I mean, answers to that question. Maybe the excuse, I mean answer, is lack of time, or maybe another answer, I mean, excuse, oh, whatever, is life getting the best of them. Seriously? Life? That’s a new one. Here’s the funny thing, a workout may be performed anywhere. Eating right is pretty easy, as long as the right choices are made. Whoa! I just cracked the magic word! Choices!

“I have to get fast food or pizza every night because I don’t have time to cook.”

Okay, well, there are actually healthier options out there to pick up instead of pizza and fast food. Many restaurants these days have pick-up options.

“Yeah, but by going through a drive-thru, I don’t have to leave my car.”

That’s cool, Applebees has that I believe, along with chicken caesar salads plus sirloin and vegetables.

“My kids don’t each vegetables.”

You’re the parent!

“It’s 2015!”

You’re the parent!

“It’s child abuse if I force kids to eat what they don’t want to.”

You’re the parent.

“I vote liberal.”

What?

“I’m a politically correct individual.”

Huh?

Substitute excuses for lack of physical activity as well. I don’t have enough time to write about injuries (work around it), or kids who would rather play video games (don’t buy it for them) or that today is different than yesterday (that’s a desperation card, buddy).

So, the point I’m making is that make this year the year to really buckle down, hit the fitness goals, and forget about time. Here are a few tips:

• Wake up earlier than usual. No more of this “I’m too tired” excuse. That’s all it is. You don’t feel like waking up, that’s all it is.
• Don’t like waking up early? Don’t feel like it? Okay, admit it then, and save the workout for after work. If you don’t want to take time away from others, then you better go with tip number one.
• Make healthy choices that are easy to make. In other words, foods that aren’t complicated to cook or won’t take as much time to prepare. It’s easy. Packaged low sodium tuna is a good place to start. Don’t like tuna? There’s chicken. Don’t like meat? Try a variety of nuts. Don’t like nuts? Try fat free dairy. Lactose intolerant? Eat eggs. Can’t afford to eat good food (because you buy your kids junk) then go to your local town drunk and buy him beverages and charge him double for it.
• Can’t afford to go to the gym? Have you ever heard of Herschel Walker? Look him up, he does something like a bunch of push-ups, sit-ups, sprints, and bodyweight squats. Want more variety? Diamond Push-ups, chair dips, bodyweight lunges, split squats, scissor kicks, etc.There are a ton of bodyweight movements to do.
• Is working out just plain boring? Take the exercises I mentioned in the previous tip and do them in front of a TV.
• Still sucks? Do them while you watch your favorite TV show.
• Still not cutting it? Try doing the workout with a friend, all the while watching your favorite TV show.
• Still suck? Get another workout partner. Three times the charm, right?

So, there you have it, a few tips to get you going for the new year. But, now that you have some exercises, how do you do them? Can’t do a push-up, do them elevated. Still can’t do them? Find a wall, now try them. Same goes with any of these exercises. Do crunches hurt your back? Do planks. Planks too easy? Try doing them while raising the opposite arm and leg off the ground. Still too easy? Put your two year old on your back……now that’s a challenge! Is the bodyweight squat too easy? Try a five second descent and ascent then come and talk to me.

Now, do your friends like the lifestyle change? No. Hate to say it, but find new friends. See ya later, bud! This part is especially easier if you join a gym. Now, don’t do what I do and pull a Joe Namath and make a guarantee a few years back that you’d be the most prominent graduate from the Class of 2009 at Edison High School…..that may have been a mistake but hey, I don’t think anyone of them are still competing in any type of organized sporting activity and have their pictures online. When I get that muscle car and condo it’s gonna be lights out, game over, I told you so at the ten year reunion when I drive the thing right into the building. In other words, joining the gym would be easier in that regard since you will be surrounded by a motivating bunch of people who won’t try to bring you down to their beer-fest weekend, uh, I mean, their own level.